Entroopia ja essents: Epilogue to Christchurch

Ullala 7 months ja 21 days!!!

This is exactly how long I have been in Chch. When I just counted the days now I really didn't know what to think of it. Kind of funny in its own way. I came here to travel and ended up settling down in one place. When I first came to NZ I heard stories about people who had spent months in one place and then traveled only little bit around. Every time when I heard story like this I was thinking myself what a bunch of silly people, not taking advantage of opportunity to explore much as possible. 

Yeah... well... Here I am.. or have been 7 months and 21 days. 
I started to think that fate in my life have had weird sense of humor sometimes. I start out with idea of something and suddenly end up other side of the idea and then I am like "how did I end up here". Quite long time ago I really didn't want to do anything with computers but I ended up as tech support and moved on with my career to be IT project manager. Once I thought that grappling martial arts are ridiculous, why would you do that when you can strike and kick but ended up with BJJ, now have tried some wrestling here in NZ and loving the hell out grappling arts. Tho I have always dreamed of traveling I have thought that going to Australia (and maybe NZ) are really basic and unimaginative places to go. I was more than certain I will never go these places. The fact that I am writing this on balcony in NZ with plan to take a flight to OZ in 2 months is kind of self explanatory how this ended up.



And when I arrived to NZ idea of staying in one place seemed to be weird thing to do, especially in Chch because stories I heard always kept saying the same thing, that it is one of the slowest nothing going on cities in NZ. Can't do much but laugh about myself after all this time, tehee. One thing I have learned about these things is that you should never have prejudice. Things change, you learn more while you go and you might realize how immature was your first thought about something. 
When I first came to NZ I had attitude that I will explore and travel the shit out of this country. After couple of months it still had the same idea, but now as time has passed I have more relaxed approach towards travel and lot of other things as well. I don't have this missing out feeling anymore, life happens anyway while you are doing things and you never can't  do everything anyway, so might as well enjoy things what you are doing in place you are. Ending up doing things you never thought you would do is probably part of growing as a person, being open to new ideas makes you more as a whole. 

Last evening after BJJ class I ended up chatting with one my training mates. Who is originally from Bahrain (If I remember correctly). I assume that religion is big part of his life, being from Arabia, he does not eat certain meat and don't drink alcohol. I have always thought religious people are always nutcases more or less (prejudice again, eh..) but I think he is one the most educated and smartest person I have met here in NZ. He has always something to say about any matter. He is able to do this always without any prejudice and explaining his point of views thoroughly. Also tho he is half the size of me he can easily kick my ass in BJJ.
Anywho, after the class he explained some of techniques I wanted  to learn and we ended up chatting, about bjj, about me leaving and traveling in general. It was really moved when he thanked me training with gym and it would be sad me leaving, but also he added that traveling is the way you can grow as person most and one should enjoy it much as possible. I can't deny, I liked that idea for obvious reasons, that I get more out of coming to NZ than just nice selfies. 

That also struck close because lasts days, ok to be honest even past months I have been thinking about it. Traveling and things. I haven't traveled much as I thought I will, but as I like to say "life happens". On the other hand I have never in my life had before those week off holidays in Egypt or somewhere similar place which is touristi and all you do is sit on beach or by pool in hotel and say you have traveled and enjoyed life. I have always dreamed of being one place longer and getting to know the local places, culture, life and people. I thought spending a year in NZ would be good opportunity for this. I ended up going even deeper which was not initial plan but I am really glad that I have done this.

In Chch I started out as house keeper in hostel, moved from there to hang around with inner circles of startup community. Built foundation and network to start my own start up business. Gotten into good training routine. Learned new things in BJJ and have gained respect of people trainning there. Even in the ranks of higher belts. Made heaps of new friends. I know my way around Chch and use navigation if going to part of city I have never been. Mostly I only have too look up on map where it is and I can drive there without navigation. I truly feel that I have  had taste of real essence of Chch and nz. I Know what it is to live here as a local not just passing trough backpacker. Also I have felt for months now how comfort zone has creep'd closer and closer. It feels like I have been here whole my life, I know everything about nz and really can't be bothered that much with a idea to pack my bags and head somewhere unknown. Live out of car, campsites, hostels and go fully off grid. I m living in nice place with nice view with awesome people, have chill work and I have heaps of things to do. I hate the idea of that my time is up and I have to move on. In a way it feels harder to leave Chch than home year ago because i know I wont be coming back here, but on other hand I am more hardened after countless goodbyes which evens it out slightly.
I have became to realize to comfort zone is another word for entropy in everyday life (thermodynamic quantity representing the amount of energy in a system that is no longer available for doing mechanical work). When you get in your comfort zone you become more inert and have less momentum to keep going. Which kind of sucks when you have insatiable appetite to explore. It has even crossed my mind to back home for a little and do my everyday things there and have nice couch to sit on and watch TV etc. Money and time vise doesn't seem to be best decision. And where is the fun in that. Finally entropy, a natural state of  system where every system moves toward, will follow you, making it harder to set your foot on the road again. I still have some momentum in me so might as well use it.   
Essence and entropy comes in hand, can't have one without other.



Damn time flies... Past 5 months I have been working as lagger and to be honest in first time in my life I can say that I have truly enjoyed this job. There is no stress, you just show up and do your thing. It can be occasionally monotous but on other hand often there were those tiny challenges, where you just sat in one place for hours and tried to make everything perfect. I find that this work has helped really grasp what it means to be patient, a personality attribute that I think I needed to improve with myself.
And to be honest I was really lucky with the company and people I ended up working with. Overtime was well paid, working hours were perfect and fit well with my training routine, we had monthly staff meetings (read: drinks in bar on boss's dollar) and guys there were really chill and I was accepted part of the group really fast, my work was respected and could do things in my own pace.
Last week at work was interesting life lesson in a way as well. With us started working one dude aprox. a month ago. At first no one really had opinion about him, but quickly  it became apparent that he was constantly late (about 10-20 minutes, which is quite noticeable among other people when you get paid per hour), his work ethic was lacking and he was often found browsing his phone when he was supposed to work.
I got along with him pretty well and I learned that he was really in need of money (for fines, rent, eye surgery etc.) and also that despite those shortcomings I mentioned before he was doing quality work. But all the splits in insulation and problems that were found later were attributed to him by evryone else. Go figure.. Anywho, long story short bosses were looking reason to gt rid of him, and when one day he didn't show up to work he was fired.
On the other hand, I was leaving in couple of days and boss asked if I wanted reference... Sure! Of course I want it, it might became handy when traveling to OZ. And it seemed so weird that on one side there was dude getting fired and other one getting recognition. And all that was result of their attitude towards work. Ok there is no big lesson to learn, but I thought it was funny/interesting.
My last days at work ended to overlap with monthly meeting (unintentionally) which was convenient way to spend last Friday with work mates. It was lot more fun than I expected. I was even recognized by the big boss himself in his speech about my work. And after working and training for ages it felt pretty damn good to just have beers and have fun.






Soon after I came to Chch and had some spare time I looked up Capoeira clubs here and started taking part of the classes. There were 2 clubs and I just picked one and started off pretty casually but ended up going regularly to both clubs classes. One them practiced Regional and other Angola. Tho both clubs were really small people there loved really what they did. Occasionally they organized joint events from workshops to casual dinners together. Which I really enjoyed. I had chance to meet new people and see how locals lived and I ended up getting many new awesome friends
Most fun part was of course playing Capoeira. And for my leaving both clubs got together and organized Roda for me. As a custom, person who is celebrated plays the game whole duration of Roda. Looked the video later and I ended up staying in Roda for 40 minutes without rest. In the end I was quite exhausted but definitely happy.

Obrigado!!!














Muidugi kui ma lõpuks tööle läksin ning esimene sissetulek olemas oli siis esimene asi mis tegin läksin maadlema. Chch googeldamise peale leidsin kaks suuremat klubi. Üks oli osa mingisugusest suuremast spordi Gym'ist ja teine tundus olevat tavaline klubi. Saatsin mõlemasse meilid et tahaks tulla veidi mürama. Fancy'st gym'ist tuli mingi nii pikk ja keeruline meil et ma ei viitsinud seda läbi isegi lugeda kui teisest tuli midagi stiilis "Yea sure bro, just come to class tonight". Teine valik tundus üsna iseenesestmõistetav.
Tagasi vaadates leian, et see oli ainuke õige otsus. Lisaks sellele et trennid toimusid 6 korda nädalas ning andis vabaduse lennata matile peaagu mis iganes päeval oli ka trenni formaat igati eluterve, lühike soendus, seejärel u.30-45 min. uue tehnika läbi võtmiseks. Iga nädal oli kaks uut teemat erinevatel nädalapäevadel. Trenni ülejäänud tunni sai rullida ennast kringliks. Slow relaxed roll, ning tehnilisus mitte toore jõud olid millele seal rõhku pandi. Mingeid imelikke jorokeid seal ei olnud kes jõuga pressiksid ning kogu vibe oli väga relax ja chill seal.
Korra nädalas toimusid ka maadlustrennid. Kuna enne polnud takedowne õppinud siis sain seal lõpuks käpad valgeks. Maadlus trenni viis läbi Sam Belkin kes hunniku võistlusi lukku pannud ka mujal kui NZ-s ning lihtsalt super oli vaadatakuidas ta ilma mingi pingutuseta tüüpe vasakule paremale siruli pani.
AXIS NZ BJJ-s oli mul ka esimest korda päriselus võimalik näha kuidas vöö saamisel vöödega nüpeldamine käib. Kuigi lubatud oli ainult vastu selga uhada siis siiski jättis see imeliku mulje. Kui see nüpeldamine välja jätta siis see väga äge seltskond.

Anyway, esimese trenni juurde tagasi tulles. Kuna tasude kohta netis infot ei olnud ning meilis ka vastust ei saanud ja öeldi ainult et tule kohale, siis kui peale trenni küsisin palju casual tasu on (st. maksad iga korra eest kui kohal käid), kuna seljakotiga olles elu pidevas liikumiseks ning mingi rutiini järgi trennis käia ja püsitasusid maksta pahatihti ei jõua. Selle peale vaatas coach mulle otsa küsis kaua olen u. siin ja ütles 10 ühe korra eest ja 30 nädala eest, käi palju tahad. Algselt ei olnud mul kindlat plaani püsivalt trennis käia (loe: ei oodanud et see võimalik on), kuid sellise sobiva hinna, aegade ja chill vibe koosmõjul seda ühe korra kaart ei kasutanudki väga ning Jisti sõltuvust tekitava omaduse tõttu veetsin enamus aja peale tööd matil. Mitte päris igapäev, sest pidin nädalapäevi ka Capoeira vahel jagama ning lõpuks otsustasin lihtsalt optimeerida, et peale maadlust otse Capoeirasse ja nii kujuneski välja et vähemalt 5 korda nädalas trennis (kahel päeval 3 tunnised trennid kuna mitu trenni järjest).
Trenni tasust sain ühe fakti teada tükimaad hiljem kui mõned kuud juba trenni tehtud. Trennitamise "allakäigu spiraali" üheks oluliseks katalüsaatoriks oli soodne hind Jitsis ja kui nüüd tagasi mõelda ju siis ma nägin välja üsna õnnetu karvase vaese hipi moodi välja kui esimest korda trenni läksin, sest nagu selgus et tavahind nädala kohta oli tegelikult 70 NZD. Ma ei oska ise sellest muud järeldust teha kui seda, et kuna ma seal ajutiselt nagunii olin siis mingi Jitsi vaimu ilmutusel andis treener mulle võimaluse lihtsalt trenni teha. Mis aga näitab positiivselt Jitsi vennaliku suhtumist üksteisesse ning et taga ei aetud bisnist ega kuulsust vaid taheti et inimesed saaksid mürada.

Aeg lendas siin märkamatult ning olin juba hakkamas otsi kokku tõmbama kui selgus et on Chch-s võistlused tulemas. Ja kuna ma siin hunniku trenni teinud, mu bucket listis oli NZ's võistelda, need toimusid samas linnas siis yep yep, lükkasin lahkumist mõne nädala võrra edasi ja panin võistlustele kirja. Veidike veider nagu oli, et kodus tegin nogi'd, siin ainult gi'd ja siin võistlen nogi's.

Kuna tegu esimese võistlusega ning mõte oli lihtsalt proovida ära kuidas värk on ei hakanud ma selle pärast eriliselt pablama. Kuigi väike sabin oli sees. Eelkõige vigastuse võimaluse olemas olu üle. Oleks totter midagi välja väänata enne kui reisima hakkad ning kõige tipuks kindlustus seda ei kata ka.
Täiesti juhuslikult nädal enne võistluse algust sattusin vaatama ühte TEDx videot kus räägiti närveldamise ja ennekontrolli saavutamisest hingamise abil. Videos näitas ettekande läbi viia ära kuidas minutiga ainult hingamise kontrollimise abil suutis üks pealtvaataja oma vererõhu 120 pealt viia 80 peale. Skill mida võiks osata.

Enne võistlusi istusin oma ägedal rõdul. Vaatasin ookeanile ning linna tulesid kauguses. Meeletu tuul oli aga samas väga soe. Kuidagi väga mõnus oli. Veidi oli sabinat sees aga mitte eriliselt. Kuidagi tobe tunne oli rohkem, et just paar tundi enne viimases trennis enne võistlusi justkui mitte miski ei tulnud välja. Kuid siiski olemine oli isegi minu enda jaoks üllatavalt Chill, pohkens, mis võistlustest saab.

Võistlused olid lõuna saare NoGi meistrivõistlused "NoGi Showdown". Sain aru, et väga tihti nad neid ei korralda ja see käib aastase intervalliga.  Kaalukategooriad olid meeletu suure vahega, oli 3 kategooriat kus ma tundusin sobivat keskmissesse 71-85. Kuna ma mõned kuud tagasi  olin kaalunud 80 siis tundus et ei saa  mööda panna. Samas kuni võistluse päevani ma ei teadnud palju ma tegelikult sel hetkel kaalusin ning kaalule astudes vahtis vastu 84.8, mis oli lihtsalt labaselt naljakas kui ma mõtlesin, et oli päris hea et hommiku vetsus käisin. Teisest küljest tähendas, et  mu kaal asetas mind tiba toiduahela kõrgema osa poole, mis oli hea.
Minu kategoorias oli kõige enam võistlejaid (kokku vist 12). Kui soendus oli tehtud oli ka väike sabin juba sees aga peale TEDx vaatamist olin ennast suutnud nii palju harjutada, et kui tundus et ärevus tuli peale siis automaatselt läksin üle teadlikule hingamisele. Trennikaaslased olid hoiatanud et närv lööb täiega sisse ja tekib tunnel vision ning kõik tüübid panevad seal 110-nega ja väga raske saab olema esimene kord. Kuigi ma ise tundsin, et teadlik hingamine aitas siis fakt, et ma väga palju oma matsidest ei mäleta tähendab, et kadusin ilmselt ära ikka kuskile tunnelisse. Hiljem videotelt vaadates tegin mingeid jaburusi, olin siruli pikali, tõusin vahepeal guardist püsti et uuesti guardi minna, rüht vajab parandamist, raskuse peale panemine ning ruumi ära võtmine samuti.

Round 1
Võistlejaid oli palju ning kogu selle segaduse juures ma täpselt ei teadnud millal minu kord olema pidi. Olin soojenduse ära teinud, aga siis niisama logelema jäänud ja kuskile mõtetesse kadundu kui järsku hüüti minu nimi ning oli vaja matile minna. Mis ikka, rullides saab ka soojak uuesti.
Kuna takedownides ma pädev ei ole siis ainuke plaan mis mul oli, oli guardi tõmmata ja edasi vaadata mis juhtub. Sain kiiresti sweepi ning olin peal ning üritasin välja mõelda mis lukke teha annab. Osasid kägistusi nagu Ezekiel, mida tegelikult suudan ainult ehku peale teha siis nö. kasutasin neid ainult ähvardamiseks, et vastane hakkaks nende vastu kaitsma ning samal ajal teeb vea kuskil mujal.
Lõpuks sain ta scaffoldi (koduklubi keeles "paska"). Vahemärkusena pean välja tooma, et võistusele eelnenud trennis oli peatreener mulle just näidanud mõned detailid kuidas paremini kontroll hoida selles asendis (kui üks tüüp oli ära  põgenenud minu käest.). Peale veidike ebaõnnestunud pusimist meenus järsku, reiest kinni, õlg sisse, kontroll ja seejärel käe kallale. Tundus et sellel vennal olid kummist käed, I shit you not ta küünarnukk oli vähemalt 120 kraadi valele poole enne kui tap tuli.



Round 2
Seekord juba läksin kindlamalt madistama, enam ei mäleta kuidas kutsuti sinna kuna kogu võistluste aja olin oote reziimis oma hingamisega, ei vaadanud ühtegi matši ega teadnud suurt mis käimas on. Kui minu nimi hüüti siis astusin matile ja tegin mis vaja teha oli.
Kogu see mats oli veidi sasipundar, aga mis ma mäletan matsi algusest oli see et kui käed kokku lõime siis märkasin silm nähtavalt et vastase käed värisesi.
Taaskord pettekägistustega pusides ja tühja rabeledes jõudsin lõpuks ühe väga robustse armbarini.





Round  3
Kolmas vend oli juba asjalikum, ilmselt juhtub nii kui ennast lahingute kadalipus kõrgemale vead. Ta oli üsna jässakas ja jõuline ning mul oli palju tegemist, et olukorda kontrollida, Paar katset trianglisse viia ebaõnnestusid ning raundi lõpuks oli kett juba ripakil et väga midagi asjalikku ei suutnud teha.
Võistlused olid submission only. Aga juhul kui seda 5 min. jooksul ei saadud siis olid reeglid sellised, et lisaajal on mõlemail 1 minut et kordamööda backist põgeneda. Kuna ma leian et backist põgenemine on seni olnud NZ-s maadeldes üks mu tugevusi siis oleks see justkui pidanud sobima. Mõned kuud tagasi harisin ennast selles osas edasi kui üks trennikaaslane eestist jagas mõned detailid mis ma ära olin unustanud.
Seadsin ennast strateegiliselt valmis, Üks, kaks kolm läks 3, 2, 1 ja ma olin põgenenud. Seejärel oli vastase kord aga isegi kohtuniku hääle toonist oli kuulda, et ta väga ei oodanud et keegi seal nii kiiresti minekut teeb ning veel vähem 2 sekundiga põgeneb, mis vastasel vaja oleks olnud et mind võita.



Round 4
Kuna ma üldse ei olnud jälginud mis seisus võistlused on ja kes kellega madistab. Kui 4-ndale matšile kutsuti siis peas arutlesin, et krt kaua see jant kestab, ilmselt peab kuskil lõpupoole olema ja isegi kui kaotan siis pean ikka veel matile minema 3ndat kohta püüdma. Ja kui võidan siis lähen mingi  erilise retsidevistiga kokku. Oeh jah, väsimus, füüsiline ja vaimne oli tuntav, kael ja selg olid kuskilt nikastunud ja üsna valusad (piisavalt et hiljem õhtu kõndimine, istumine või mis iganes asend tekitas korralikku valu).
Vastane oli ilmselgelt kogenum ja asjalikum kui eelmised. Hiljem kuulsin et ta 3a. trennis käinud ja pidi päris tasemel olema. Selles raundis tegin kõige rohkem lollusi tagantjärgi vaadates ning lõpuks kui mounti sain, märkasin et tüüp on paanikas ja punnitab üleliia. Ma lausa jõudsin lugeda üle, et kui mina hingasin korra siis tema tegi seda 3 korda. Nii palju on mul kaitses mängimisest kasu olnud et õppinud  rahulikuks seal jääma, ja kui seal juba suudad chill olla siis peal olles võiks samahästi juba samal ajal oma poe ostu nimekirja koostada samal ajal. Arvasin et väsitades ja survet avaldades peaks midagi lõpuks oma kasuks saama pöörata. Jõudsin lõpuks samuti scafoldi nagu esimeses matsis ning seekord tuli sub juba automaagiliselt.


Parim osa oli see et kui see läbi sai ja kohtunik kuulutas "winner, The champion". Olin ma et wat wat? mis see tähendab. Aga jah tegu oli finaaliga ilma et ma seda teadsin. Ise enda reaktsiooni nähes ajab see endiselt naerma.
Matilt tulles õnnitlesid ridamisi hunnik inimesi ja ma ikka pidin küsima, et kas päriselt oli viimane.

Kuigi pärast viimast matsi oli üsna sült olla, selg ja kael valusad ning korralik pinge langus siis oli kirjeldamatult hea tunne, ma ei oodanud midagi aga sain kõik, võidujoovastus on täiesti reaalne asi.










Oh shit.., act cool





3, 2, 1










Champion? who..? me... hahahaaa!!    Awww yisss...






Booyakasha







After winning NZ South Island BJJ submission only NoGi Showdown it was time to celebrate of course with my flatmates, training partners and friends.

Getting party started


Last days before leaving Chch, after competition were quite emotionless. I think I  had run the leaving day too many times trough in my head and it had sort of desensitized sad feelings. It was just that my time was up and I had  to move on. Break the entropy after absorbing the essence. I had final chance with my good friend Joris to grab couple of beers and eat bloodsausage whih he had found in supermarket. I think he was more happy and exited about trying out Estonian traditional food than I was. Bloodsausage was good, not quite what back home, but very similar. Appropriate goodbye dinner.






Evening I used my last opportunity to enjoy glass of whiskey on my houses balcony gazing stars in warm summer breeze.


I really have enjoyed my time here.



Will miss this place




Comments